Craving a ‘beach-ready body’ is the surest way to self-loathing, but I still want one

At this time of year, many find themselves wracked with insecurity over the shape and size of their bodies. For Charlotte Cripps, a last-minute invitation to a swimming pool playdate threw her into a tailspin about body image and insecurity

‘The invitation from my friend arrived at short notice. For him, it’s just a playdate. For me, it’s my world turned upside down’ (iStock/The Independent)

It’s scorching hot. The phone rings. I’ve been invited to an exclusive members-only club in west London with an outdoor pool by my single dad friend. “Bring the kids,” he says jovially, “it’s my treat!” While most people in this weather might leap out of the front door ecstatically with their suntan lotion at the ready, my immediate reaction is terror. “I’m not summer ready,” I say to myself. “Do I have bingo wings?”

I wish I could be more like Zulma Melecio, a TikTok influencer from Texas who this week went viral for proudly posing in a two-piece swimsuit – despite claiming that her body isn’t “summer ready”. Social media users have praised her for her message of body positivity. Yet, I still feel under pressure to look perfect. Am I alone in being paranoid about the concept of being “beach-body ready”? Since I’ve had two kids, my body needs a lot of work to keep it toned. The closest I get to any exercise is walking my dog. I don’t have time for pedicures or pilates.

I’m not even sure what dreaded terms like “summer ready” or “beach-body ready” really mean anymore, and whether these days it would involve me having “mummy makeover” surgeries for my post-pregnancy aesthetic concerns. Breast implants? Liposuction? Laser treatments on my stomach where I had a C-section? The invitation from my friend arrived at short notice. For him, it’s just a playdate. For me, it’s my world turned upside down. It’s fine in the winter when we hurtle around the local park playing hide-and-seek with our children in thick coats – but now he’s asking me to go swimming? Will he judge me for not having a shredded physique? Is my body a reflection of my self-worth?