How to ruin a clergyman’s Lent

After a break from taking a break in the Covid years, Will Gore has given up chocolate once again – but an innocent error with a chalice left him red-faced this week

On the evening of Ash Wednesday, I was suffering the twin perils of Anglican smugness and a sugar dip (Getty/iStock)

I used to give up chocolate for Lent – religiously. Every year I’d swallow that bitter pill of not swallowing either bitter mint or dairy milk between Shrove Tuesday and Easter Day. I might treat myself to a Twix on a Sunday, or perhaps to a midweek Milky Bar (white chocolate not counting, obviously), but otherwise my observance would be exceptional. An Easter egg blowout would be more than justified.

But in the mean Covid years, my Lenten zeal went out of the window – or maybe got locked down. Pathetic though it may seem now, life felt challenging enough without taking away sweet treats. I tried to make up for it in other ways, but with limited success. God’s brow might have furrowed, but I’m sure he/she understood.

Anyway, now we’re in apparently post-pandemic times, I have no excuse – never mind that half the people I know seem to have Covid at the moment. And so last Tuesday, I troughed a large number of pancakes, a chocolate biscuit, an Elizabeth Shaw mint and a dozen wine gums, before unpacking the sackcloth and ashes for a full-on barren period. I’ve even chucked sweets and crisps onto the banned list for good measure, which – allied to my Protestant(ish) work ethic – should secure my salvation in the long run. Or at least delay the clogging of my arteries and the onset of diabetes.