Latin abbreviations vs plain English: what’s your MO?

The civil service wants to anglicise and expand its communications. RIP common sense, then

The civil service wants to purify the language of the tribe by getting rid of any hint or taint of Latin culture (Rex)

NB: henceforth E=mc², probably the most famous equation in the world, will be known as “energy equals mass multiplied by the speed of light squared”. Not quite so snappy is it? At least if the civil service has its way. According to one Persis Howe of the Government Digital Service (formerly known as GDS), all abbreviations are to be banned in future, ie all those handy little shortened forms, e.g. “e.g.’, “i.e.”, etc, are out. And “etc”. They are too confusing, apparently.

Presumably .gov should go as well. Not to mention .uk. Or possibly the UK entirely? By the same token, the USA will be wiped off the map. To be fair, I guess the EU is going to have to go, too. But it seems strange in a period when “LOL” and “OMG” have been added to the Oxford English Dictionary. And I can’t help but wonder if the very Latinate-sounding Persis is not trying to be more English than thou, in a spirit of post-Brexit triumphalism.

The idea is to purify the language of the tribe by getting rid of any hint or taint of Latin culture (“i.e.” comes from id est, “that is”; while “e.g.” comes from exempli gratia, “for the sake of example”). It’s perfectly fair, it’s democratic, it’s been decided on by referendum. I just can’t work out how to say that without using words like referendum (Latin) or democratic (Greek). The imperative to revert to straight Anglo-Saxon means we have to start talking like hobbits or elves.

Linguistic paranoia could lead to the ultimate nightmare: we will have to stop using all those handy French idioms. Personally I find that, particularly in the erotic realm, soixante neuf and ménage à trois have a certain cachet (though my dictionary may find them “vulg”). Not to mention the coup de foudre. Au revoir, then, baguettes and croissants! I will miss décolletage. I feel that the civil service is making a terrible gaffe here.

Even if it is not foreign words per se, but only the classic shortened forms that have to go, a lot of academics are going to have to revise their books, especially the bibliographies and footnotes. All those “id’s” (idem, “the same man”) and “cf’s” (from conferre, “to compare”) and “ibid’s” (ibidem, “in the same place”) are going to have to go. PhD students will struggle without “op cit” (opere citato, “work cited”) surely? In fact, PhD students will also have to be replaced by Doctor of Philosophy students (technically Philosophiae doctor; the Oxford DPhil is the same, only vice-versa). And when you've finished your BA or BSc, don’t bother writing your CV either. It will have to be curriculum vitae (“course of life”) or nothing. Probably nothing, then. Unless it’s a résumé (as in the USA). But I imagine Persis would prefer “career summary” or something.

Meanwhile, inter ales, Christianity is going to be entirely overthrown without AD (anno domini); the civil service will have to make long work of that concise classic of Hollywood hokum, 10,000 BC; and Titanics will no longer be able to tap out “SOS”. Nor, I suppose, will we be able to write “RIP” (requiescant in pace) for all the lost souls either.

Just an ad hoc thought here, but as an avid reader of thrillers, I have become fond of detectives speaking of a villain’s “MO”. If the GDS has its way, it will have to be the much clunkier modus operandi, or even, sadder still, “method of operating”. And as a West Ham fan, I am sorry that we will not be playing versus, or even vs, or v Spurs or Man U this season. But who would know the kick-off time? We will no longer be able to say 8am (ante meridien) or 10pm (post meridien). It will have to be nought eight hundred or twenty hundred hours. More like a plane taking off than getting out of bed in the morning.

Finally, if I was sending this in an email, it would have “re: abbreviations” in the subject line (ie from in re, “concerning”). Pity, really. But RIP.

PS (ie post scriptum, or, as the civil service would write, “after what has been written”): Mister Persis Howe et al of GDS should stop trying to lower the IQ of the nation. Or possibly banning it. QED. OK?

PPS: Andy Martin is the author of ‘Reacher Said Nothing: Lee Child and the Making of ‘Make Me”’ (Bantam)