Rebecca Front: 'Facial hair fashions include goatees and soul patches and the topiaried eyebrow'

Saturday 21 August 2010 00:00 BST
Comments

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

If you ask me, the best indicator of the zeitgeist is men's facial hair. Take the Victorians, for example, pioneers in science and technology. These men wore big beards. And mutton chop whiskers. Even, on occasion, kiss curls. They grew hair at every conceivable angle from their faces, as if to say to an enquiring world: "My head is full of investigative zeal. I have no time to snip and trim and wax. And even if I had the time I wouldn't, because this is a brave new world, and I can sprout like no man has sprouted before." Look at their images: Charles Darwin, sporting a beard that seemed to prove man's closeness to the apes. Look at the 5th Governor of Michigan, a man solid enough in his convictions to be able to withstand both his unfortunate name (Alpheus Felch) and a ridiculous nude top and chinstrap beard. Was this a man who feared being laughed at? Certainly not.

And it's not just Victorian men who were defined by their facial fashion. Take the hippies of the Sixties, so confident in their sexual liberation that the dolly-birds would still hang out with them, even though their fresh-faced youthfulness was marred by unwashed phizog pubery. Look at Second World War Spitfire pilots and their handlebar moustaches. You don't need an Enigma machine to decode those whizz-bang whiskers. They say: Listen, Gerry. I've got a spitfire coming your way. Do you really want to laugh at the weird aberration below my nostrils?

And so to the facial hair fashions of today, the overly fussy fuzz: goatees, side-strips and soul patches. And oddest of all – the topiaried eyebrow: waxed underneath, and in extreme cases striped at the sides. What is that all about? It was when I remembered a male friend saying he'd shaved his chest because he was bored, that its message became clear: I've nothing to do but look at myself in a mirror while doodling with my shaver. Consequently, I have nothing of any interest to say. But with luck, you will be so distracted by my bizarre eyebrows, you won't notice.

That is 2010 in a nutshell. We should all be very proud.

Rebecca Front is an actress and comedian.

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in