Love & Hate in 2006/07

No split was noisier, or costlier, in 2006 than that of Sir Paul McCartney and Heather Mills, whose legal battle will dominate headlines in the coming year too. So thank Saint Valentine for Little Britain star Matt Lucas and partner Kevin McGee, and the 15,000 other couples keeping romance alive with their civil partnerships

When they woke on the very first day of 2006, Darryl Bullock and Mark Godfrey were on their honeymoon. Along with 700 other couples, Darryl and Mark had not been able to wait to pledge themselves to each other for the rest of their lives, so held their civil partnership ceremony at 8am on the day it became legal.

They wore Marks & Spencer suits, invited 20 friends to a full English breakfast at their local pub and celebrated new year for two in Torquay. More than 15,000 civil partnerships took place between then and September, according to the Office for National Statistics. Wedding retailers have reported a surge in the sales of porcelain tea sets, Ralph Lauren cashmere blankets and quality champagne.

For romantics, it was fortunate that the year started with so much hope, love and expensive bubbly. It ended that way too, for the Little Britain star Matt Lucas and his partner Kevin McGee, who wore sober suits for their civil partnership ceremony in December but then threw a lavish fancy dress party.

Without civil partnerships, 2006 would have deserved to be known for ever as the year of the acrimonious split. Specifically, the split of Paul McCartney and Heather Mills, which rumbled like distant thunder through the headlines of the year, and looks set to break all records for money, media coverage and caustic bitterness.

The relationship had clearly been stormy for months. But the first bolt of lightning struck at the beginning of May, when newspapers reported that Heather had left home. Paul immediately spoke out: "It has been suggested that she married me for the money and there is not an ounce of truth in this," he insisted. The idea of a £50m "quickie divorce" was soon written off: Heather was gunning for £200m of Paul's money.

A cynic might say that what followed was a battle of the spin doctors. She was photographed looking distressed and wan in locations all over the country. He was snapped looking tired and crumpled getting off aeroplanes. She signed up Princess Diana's divorce lawyer, Anthony Julius. He signed up Prince Charles's divorce lawyer, Fiona "Steel Magnolia" Shackleton. His side bought the tapes that she wanted to use in her court case. Her side allegedly leaked documents from his. She said he sent her a legal note about cleaning fluid. He said she threw a bottle of ketchup at him.

"My advice to her would be simple," the king of PR, Max Clifford, told The Independent on Sunday in August. "Take a sensible amount and get out as soon as possible." Neither party shows any signs of taking his advice.

That is a shame, because Heather and Paul need not even look outside celebrity land to find some shining examples of the amicable divorce. This year, Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson were the co-signatories of a charming card, which depicts Andrew on a trip to India wearing a comedy turban, flanked by Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie, wearing expressions of pure, teenage contempt. Jude Law and Sadie Frost have been spending Christmas with their three children and her son from a previous relationship, helping children with HIV in an orphanage in southern Africa. Chris Evans and Billie Piper, whose divorce was finalised in September, can hardly seem to stay away from each other. She has even said that she doesn't want a penny from her multimillionaire ex-husband, and thinks the very thought of taking his money is "disgusting".

Besides couples who seem to be always together even though they are divorced, this has been a year in which we have wondered: "Why on earth isn't she divorcing him?" Pauline Prescott and her irrepressible barnet stuck with John Prescott, even after elements of his romps with his secretary Tracey Temple were revealed in schoolgirlish detail in her diaries in April. "He can be a randy old sod at times coz he wanted sex again," she wrote. "He was so up for it though."

Big Brother's Nikki Grahame confessed that she was still in love with Pete Bennett, after the pair got together on live TV over the summer and then he dumped her when he realised that she was a nutter. (It took him a bit longer than most of us.) Sienna Miller forgave Jude Law's affair - and then he forgave hers - and then she dumped him in January, announcing to the press apropos of nothing, "Stay single! Stick together with your girlies!" The pair were back on sooner than you could say "Keep him away from your girlies!" but this month they split for good. Again. So did Sven and Nancy, again. Weirdly, she still seems to be seen by his side, usually in a plunging swimsuit. With some couples, you just give up the idea of trying to keep up.

Some though, really have been lost to us for good. In March, Hannah Gillette and James Burdge, who won a dream wedding from GMTV last year, split under the pressure of being a "perfect couple". In August Gary and Michelle Lineker, whose 20-year marriage had weathered the storms of a sick child and a career in the media spotlight announced their separation. His dad blamed the media, claiming that constant rumours wore the couple down. Some wondered whether the photos of Gary sunbathing with a topless lady friend really helped, but not Barry Lineker. "Perhaps she got sick of him playing golf a lot," he speculated. Then in November Eddie Murphy dumped poor pregnant Spice Girl Mel B, saying, with staggering crassness: "We don't know whose child that is until it comes out and has a blood test."

But the most spectacular - and long-overdue - divorce of the year had to be that of Britney Spears and her former dancer Kevin Federline. It was quite a year for the pair. In March she revealed that she was pregnant again, just five months after the birth of her first son, Sean Preston. It didn't stop Kevin partying, but in the summer he grandly announced: "As a man, I would not be happy living off my wife." Which means that he must have done an awful lot of dancing to buy all those Ferraris. Sisters everywhere raised a glass to Britney when she squeezed out her second baby in October and almost immediately filed for divorce. Now she is often seen around town without any knickers and with Paris Hilton in tow. She was last spotted snogging Jonathan Rotem, who is Kevin's boss. The man now known as "FedEx" is left bleating at home.

Paul McCartney has stopped short of traipsing about without his knickers, and is not known to have any "Heather" tattoos that need removing. Heather has been wise enough not to buy any obvious sportscars. But the split has been just as bitter, and with even more money involved. Which can only mean that we have a lot more to look forward to in 2007.

"They are both used to having their own way - hence the mess they have got themselves into," Max Clifford told The Independent on Sunday. "The lawyers will want this to drag on for as long as possible. And Heather, in some ways, will want this to drag on for as long as possible, too. The only person who will want a peaceful settlement is Paul. And if he were to be generous he could achieve that. With an extra £20m, which he can well afford, it could all be sorted out within 10 minutes."

He went on: "If this were all sorted out tomorrow, then this time next year nobody will be talking about Heather Mills. But it is too late for anyone's perceptions of him to change, long-term. He will always be a Beatle. But he will have hated all the bad publicity. He's used to being treated with huge respect by everyone, including the media. His New Year's Eve wish will be for this thing to go away as quickly and quietly and cheaply as possible. Heather will be wishing for as much money and attention as possible. Whatever happens, lawyers and PR people are going to have a happy new year. As more rich and famous people get divorced, 2007 will be even better for them than 2006."

As for Darryl Bullock and Mark Godfrey - well, sadly they will be waking up on the first day of 2007 in separate beds. The pair have announced that theirs will be the first "gay divorce", after discovering six months ago that they were not really suited to spending the rest of their lives together after all. They annulled their partnership as soon as it reached the one year mark, on 21 December - again, the first date they could legally do it.

"We were really proud to be one of the first couples to have the service and we had a great six months but then things went wrong," said Mr Bullock. "We were completely committed but things change in any relationship. We are lucky that there is no property or kids involved and we have both moved on in our own way."

Darryl and Mark's was the first civil partnership to be dissolved this year, but won't be the last. As Mr Clifford says, the lawyers will clean up the profits. So 2006 may, just about, be remembered as the year of the partnership. But 2007 could end up being seen as the year of the decree absolute.

Falling in love...

Kate Middleton and Prince William are still not engaged, but she was invited to spend Christmas Day with the Royal Family. She declined. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had baby Suri and were married this year. Pete Doherty has apparently given Kate Moss an engagement ring.

Charlotte Church and Gavin Henson are still together, despite countless public rows between the chat show diva and the shaved rugger star. Nicole Kidman married Keith Urban quietly and has denied rumours of a pregnancy since. Hugh Grant and Jemima Khan are now engaged, according to friends, but after 12 holidays in 18 months what will they do for a honeymoon?

... and out again

Britney Spears finally ditched runaround husband Kevin Federline. Former Spice Girl Mel B found it lonely in Hollywood when Eddie Murphy left her six months pregnant. While Lloyd Scott was taking five days to complete the marathon pulling a giant dragon, his wife, Carole, was sleeping with his two best friends. Hannah Gillette and James Burdge won a dream wedding from GMTV - then split under the pressure of being a "perfect couple".

After a weird but beautiful Big Brother courtship, Pete Bennett dumped Nikki Grahame, calling her a nutter. Chris Tarrant's wife, Ingrid, dumped him after finding out about his seven-year affair.