Stay up to date with notifications from The Independent

Notifications can be managed in browser preferences.

Julia Stephenson: The Green Goddess

Thursday 11 January 2007 01:00 GMT
Comments

Your support helps us to tell the story

From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.

At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.

The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.

Your support makes all the difference.

Ever since Nigella insisted that ground semolina was the secret weapon for crispy roast potatoes, it's been impossible to find any of the stuff in my neck of the woods. Several times in Waitrose I've been nearly mown down by desperate women seeking out other celebrity chef "must haves" such as goose fat and organic ground mace. I thought ground mace was something one sprayed at rapists, but not so.

Celebrity chefs are the gods of our time and their utterances are seized upon with the awe and respect we used to accord to statesmen, the Queen and religious leaders. But I remain optimistic that the reign of celebrity chefs will soon be over and replaced by... ecologists. If ecologists had as much influence, we'd see an unprecedented run on eco-friendly light bulbs and happily live on kale for months. We'd be rushing out to buy straw bales, which would be available in supermarkets throughout the country.

Let me explain. After perusing my recycled glass ball, I predict straw bales will be the latest must-have for the hard-core Green this year. I'll soon be attending a permaculture course and have been reading up on this fascinating science that teaches us how to live sustainably. Apparently, we should have a bale of straw in our gardens. Sensitive readers turn away now. If you pee on a bale of straw over a month, it will naturally rot down in the soil and it won't smell. It's a hassle-free composting toilet. Men's pee is preferable to women's, which is more acidic, but this may be one of those sexist permaculture myths I hear about.

I haven't tried it yet. I was born in Surrey and consequently have no clue where to find a bale. I hope to stumble across one soon and report back once I've dragged it home.

We desperately need to conserve our water. The WWF says the combination of climate change and poor resource management is leading to water shortages in even the most developed countries.

Astonishingly, less than 1 per cent of our high-quality drinking water is used for cooking and drinking. Waterwise, an NGO that specialises in saving water, says there are around 45 million toilets in UK homes, using an estimated two billion litres of fresh water every day. More than seven million of the toilets use 13 litres of water. This extravagant waste of quality drinking water is partly responsible for the tragic draining of water from our streams and rivers, which is having a devastating effect on wildlife.

The bale would also make my guest bathroom redundant, which means I can create a home office there and I won't need a loft conversion. Or perhaps I should just bale out and blow the money on a new hat and a cruise instead.

www.permaculture.org; www.naturewise.org.uk (offers details of permaculture courses); www.naturalcollection.com (sells many ingenious water-saving gadgets)

Join our commenting forum

Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies

Comments

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in